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I have been considering cut off with my father for a while. He abused my mother physically a few times and it happened again a few days ago. My parents got divorced last year, but because of the business matter, my mother is the legal representation of the company and because of that, they kept contact. The company got some tax problems, she tried to discuss with my father, but he kept avoiding. She showed up at his apartment, saw the woman he lived with, which is the person he had affair with for over 10 years. He tried to ask her leave, but she insisted to discuss in person, he dragged her out and might abused her during, she had some bruises on her arms. I knew about his violence but tried to ignore and stay peaceful with him for years, but I think he's the reason of most of the problems happened or happening in my family. I want to stop all this by convincing my siblings and my mum to cut off with him. But I also afraid of the consequences, beside the possibility financial
Sosionom svarer
Living with a violent parent is difficult and can have long-lasting consequences. Determining what is right and wrong can be challenging, and it's especially difficult to tell your other family members what to do, as they may have their own perspectives on the situation.
It sounds like your father may have exerted control over the rest of your family, allowing him to act without significant consequences. This likely has led to feelings of powerlessness and anger towards him. And I fully understand your desire to cut ties with him, no matter the cost.
It's not easy for me to recommend one course of action over another. Only you can make that decision. Sometimes, reclaiming your freedom and taking control of your own life is more important than the money or other benefits you may lose.
Have you talked to your mother and siblings about your desire to cut ties with him? What are their opinions on the matter? Is it possible for you to do this independently, or does it require a collective decision?
You mention at the end of your question, that there are consequences besides the financial ones. Does this mean he may pose a threat to you?
There are several agencies that can help those who have or are experiencing violence and threats:
- If you are in immediate danger, you can call the police at 112. They will provide assistance right away.
- You can also call the Violence and Abuse Helpline at 116 006. There, you can get help, advice, answers, and someone to talk to. The helpline is available 24/7.
- There are shelters across the country that offer protection, safety, advice, and guidance for those who have experienced violence. You can call them at 905 79 118 to learn more.
- On dinutvei.no, you can find quality-assured information about violence and abuse.
Take care of yourselves and stay safe!
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